Befriend your yoni
I was so pleased to read medical journal, The Lancet’s, conclusion that menstrual cups are safe and reliable to use. I often extol the virtues of the cup, but I’m usually met with:
“mmm, sounds strange”,
“yeah but you’re into trying weird stuff”, or
“ewww gross”.
I really wish more women would try the menstrual cup, not just because it’s a better way to experience your period, but because it improves your relationship with your vagina. I for one credit the menstrual cup and a particular strain for my ability to draw a detailed map of my poom poom.
Using a menstrual cup, ditching your panties and getting head are amongst the great things women miss out on due to the pervasive idea that vagina and vulva are something to be ashamed of. At its very worst this shame leads us to simply ignore the fact that our vaginas exist. There are many things wrong with this attitude, not least being that if you don’t know your pussy like the back of your hand, how are you are going to have an enjoyable sex life?
My first couple of times trying a menstrual cup were difficult. It didn’t sit properly, it leaked and I struggled to buy the right size and shape . It takes time, patience and money to perfect cup use, the reason many are reluctant to give it a try. However, during the process of getting it right I had a revolutionary “oh shit, this is how my vagina works!!” moment. I realised why certain positions felt better than others and how my vagina changes throughout my cycle. Learning to use a cup is a process of befriending your pussy. I highly recommend it.
If you are interested in trying the cup I would suggest perusing the internet for advice. There are many different brands and sizes, choosing the correct menstrual cup for you will make it a simple, easy experience. Here are a few sites with great advice:
https://menstrualcupreviews.net/how-to-choose-a-menstrual-cup/
“Learning to use a cup is a process of befriending your pussy”
When you know your pussy well – you know the many different places and ways you like to be touched, you know how low your cervix falls into your vagina*, you know what time of the month your cervix lifts making deep penetration more enjoyable, you know the parts of your labia that enjoy massage, you know your G spot, you know your A spot, you know whether you prefer direct clit stimulation or just the hood – this helps with having great sex. A woman who is intimately familiar with her vagina can guide a lover to move in a way that hits all those delightfully spine tingling spots. You can only uncover those places through a journey of quim self-discovery. Knowing your pussy is an important part of taking charge of your sex life.
Here are some anatomical diagrams of pussy to get you started:
It’s not just sex though. Your period, fertility issues, mental health, clothing choices - these can all be improved though a healthy loving relationship with your yoni. Confidently knowing the rhythms, changes and make up of your vagina and vulva assists in making informed decisions about your bodily and mental health.
Of course it’s hard to embrace getting to know your vagina when we have been fed messages since childhood that it’s a shameful area that should only be presented to a man during sex. Familiarity with the inner workings of your pussy is a positive journey that should be encouraged.
If you have never looked at your pussy, find a mirror (foundation case mirrors are great) and go spend some time exploring. It will be the first step towards a beautiful friendship. Also ditch your tampons and use a menstrual cup.
* Your period blood flows from your cervix, so how low your cervix falls into your vagina will impact the type of cup you need to buy. This sounds far more complicated than it actually is. Find our more details here. #teamcup